Tips to avoid maternal burnout
Perfectionism is not a healthy habit. Even less so when it comes to motherhood, unless you’re keen to rub shoulders with overwhelm, resentment, rage and the feeling of never being satisfied, which can eventually lead to maternal burnout.
Here is the new mantra you can adopt to preserve your mental, physical and emotional wellbeing when faced with the demands of mothering, working and everything in between: “Good enough is the new perfect”.
Beware of the Good Mother
The good mother is the one who does it all, preferably all at once, never raises her voice, always indulges in self-sacrifice…and does not exist! Most of us carry a lot of unhelpful and unrealistic beliefs about what a good mother is and does. So, next time you catch yourself thinking that you “should” be on top of it all, that you “should” do something productive while your baby is sleeping, that you “should” do every single pick up and drop off, think twice. Said who? Whose voice do you hear when the “should” shows up? Is it serving you or is it overwhelming you?
Learn to say no
Sometimes we forget that we are in control and can decide what we say yes to and what we say no to. If we want to stay sane and raise children who have healthy boundaries, we need to role model that behaviour ourselves. Here, it helps to think about what really matters, the values that are important in this season of your life. Once you have identified them, use them as a compass to navigate the decisions you make, no matter how mundane or challenging.
Connect with other mothers
Isolation is one of the major causes of stress for mothers. Find women to connect with and have genuine conversations about what it is really like to juggle the competing devotions that we need to wrestle with as women and mothers. This can help you normalise your feelings and bring a sense of community back into your life.
Redefine strength
Our culture defines strength as the ability to push through, be constantly “on”, do more, deliver: the perfect cocktail for burnout. What if you embraced a more balanced definition of strength, one that invites you to recognise your needs and respect them? One that gives you permission to delegate, rest, ask for help, get support through coaching, therapy or other holistic practices, prioritise your wellbeing and nourishment?
Mothering is not a walk in the park. It’s normal to not like every single day of your life as a mother, even though you may feel like you’re expected to. Ambivalence is part and parcel of being human, of being a parent, especially in a society that doesn’t value motherhood and is not set up for parents to thrive and feel supported along the way. Learn to own your new gifts and skills as a parent and be kind to yourself: you’re going through a process of transformation, learning and growth like no other.
If you’re interested in resources to help you navigate your mothering journey with more peace and confidence, I created a mini audio series with tips and tools I’ve gathered from my work and personal experience as a mother. You can download it here.
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Northern Beaches Midwifery
Northern Beaches Midwifery offers the gold standard “Continuity of Care”. As a mother, Registered Nurse, Endorsed Midwife & Lactation Consultant (IBCLC), I offer the guidance and support you need in the postnatal period. Here’s how I can assist you:
Personalised Support Every mother-baby duo is unique, and I tailor my approach to meet your specific needs. Which ever way you choose to feed your baby, breastfeeding, mixed feeding or formula, if this is your first time or have prior experience, I’m here to help you overcome any challenges.
Comprehensive Knowledge I stay current with the latest research and best practices in lactation and responsive parenting. From latching techniques to concerns about milk supply, settling baby and the normal newborn behaviour can be very confusing. I’m ready to answer your questions and provide evidence-based solutions to help you reach your breastfeeding goals.
Emotional Support I understand that a newborn baby can be an emotional journey. Alongside practical assistance, I create a caring and nurturing environment where you can freely discuss your concerns. I’m here to listen and encourage you throughout the process.
Flexible Appointments I offer both in-person visits and online virtual consultations to suit your preferences. I can schedule appointments at times that work best for you, whether you’re at home or on the go.
6-Week Postnatal Care Packages After the birth of your baby and following your hospital discharge, I will visit you at home to provide support and guidance, ensuring a successful confident start to your parenting/breastfeeding journey. Research shows that women who receive support during this time tend to breastfeed for longer. Individualised postnatal packages attract a Medicare rebate if you are within the 6-week postnatal period.
Post-Consultation Care My commitment to your journey doesn’t end with one session. If you choose, I offer ongoing support and follow-ups to help you thrive as you continue your breastfeeding experience.
Don’t let breastfeeding and challenges hold you back. Let me support you in this incredible bonding experience with your little one. Contact me today to book your personalised consultation and discover the keys to successful breastfeeding, and confident parenting
Together, we’ll make your journey fulfilling for both you and your baby! Every mother deserves the best start.
Telebaby
Telebaby with Dr. Samuel Heitner – Paediatric Help is Just a Click Away! I’m Dr. Samuel Heitner, a paediatrician with over 15 years of experience and the founder of Telebaby. Being a parent is one of the most rewarding, yet challenging, journeys you’ll ever take, and I’m here to support you whenever you need it.
I offer Telehealth video consultations tailored specifically for babies, supporting parents and families Australia-wide, 7 days a week, all from the comfort and safety of your home.
If you’re worried about your baby’s reflux, colic, constipation, poor weight gain, unsettled behaviour, rashes, suspect a milk allergy, or have any other concern, Telebaby is here to provide guidance and peace of mind. My services include a video consultation, one week of email support following your consult, and a follow-up call to check in on your baby’s progress. If needed, I can also provide Escripts, including specialised infant formula for cow’s milk allergy, blood tests, imaging, medical certificates, and more.
In addition to Telebaby, I work as a paediatrician in the Emergency Department at The Children’s Hospital at Westmead and care for babies in the Special Care Nursery and the post-natal ward at Sydney Southwest Private Hospital. I am also a Clinical Associate Lecturer with The University of Sydney and a Fellow of The Royal Australasian College of Physicians (FRACP) – Paediatrics & Child Health Division.
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